Honoring My Father's Legacy: The One Year Anniversary of His Death
Exactly one year ago, my dad died, and my life shifted dramatically - in the best way possible. Relationships that were no longer for my highest good were exiled from my life almost immediately, friendships took different form, my career path changed direction, and most importantly, I decided to start speaking my truth to the world (and not just to my diary).
I started by writing a piece to honor my dad’s legacy, which I spoke at his memorial. Writing this piece and speaking it in front of my friends and family turned out to be arguably the most healing, most rewarding, and most powerful experience I’ve had, to date.
Now that one year has passed, I am excited to continue honoring my dad’s legacy by sharing with all of you what I wrote last year. May these words serve you in some way, just as they have served father, my family, and me!
As my father, my dad’s only sacred duty was to help create me by providing DNA for my soul to come live in during this lifetime. This past week as I’ve gotten so much opportunity to reflect on his life and his impact on my life, I’ve been feeling so blessed that my dad went above and beyond his base level sacred duty as my father. Not only did he provide me with DNA, but he helped bring me safely into the world, he provided a very safe and secure life for me into adulthood, fully equipped with ample opportunities, and more recently he provided me with the most incredibly profound teachings, inspiration and experiences that I could ever have dreamt of.
When my dad first started to get sick, he taught me about vulnerability. He showed me, through his own visceral needs, what it looked like to be totally vulnerable, and how through vulnerability, we get to be shown grace, support, forgiveness and so much love from those around us. He also showed me, through my own emotional needs, what it feels like to be emotionally vulnerable, and how freeing it feels to open up your heart, forgive, express your truth, and accept love.
My dad also taught me about compassion and kindness. To become vulnerable as he was, was to command compassion and kindness from those around him. And to be his daughter and lose him like this, provided me with the experience to command compassion and kindness from those who were around me during my emotional processing, and to understand how imperative it is to offer compassion and kindness to all those with whom I come in contact.
My dad also deeply inspired me to study. His journey inspired me to go out and find my passion and life purpose, and to study spirituality. These studies have set me on my current career pathway, and they have helped me lay a very solid foundation of faith in God and a strong admiration for the brilliance of Jesus.
Perhaps what I cherish most is what my dad taught me about connection and communication. For the last few years of his life, he didn’t walk or talk, but in those years I grew increasingly more connected to him spiritually, and I’ve drawn so many teachings from him without him speaking a single word. If anything, he’s taught me that verbal communication and body language is only a very small fraction of how we truly communicate with one another.
My dad’s very last days on earth were very special to me. In fact, they were my most favorite days with him. He felt so pure to be around, much like how it feels so pure to be around a new baby or a puppy. Those of us that were around him felt very emotional at times, and we got to be emotional in front of each other and affectionate towards one another and to him. It was an experience that tied us all together so deeply and allowed us to connect with him on a deeper level and to heal together.
In the days following his death, we got to gather as a family and it became very clear to me why we are a family. We are a tribe, deeply spiritually connected to one another, and each one of us within the family has a very unique flavor and serves a very unique purpose. It was so much fun to learn this and to experience it. In addition to getting to know my family better, I have gotten to know my dad so much better over this past week. Even in looking through old photos, I was shown how strikingly beautiful and radiant he was during his time here.
I’m so grateful to my dad for all these teachings and experiences he has provided. I feel more deeply connected to him now than ever before! I’m super excited and very curious to continue to be provided with lessons and experiences from him, and to continue to get to know him better – both spiritually, and as he was as a human during this lifetime.